Restoration is Preceded by Brokenness

Remember that promise of mine that I often talked about in my previous posts? Well, it turns out I was wrong about that and while God may still have a promise – or promises – in store for me, that particular thing was never one of them. And when I woke up on September 24th and that painful truth was brought to light, I found myself swept up into a whirlwind of confusion, hurt and questions that I’ll probably never get the answer to. I questioned God’s love for me, as I’ve done in the recent past, and I wondered why He couldn’t have revealed that truth to me sooner. What I realized a few weeks later, though, was that even though I was wrong about that thing He was promising me, I was right about the fact that He was doing something within me.

After reading Myles Munroe’s “Single, Married, Separated and Life After Divorce,” I learned that divorce is a traumatic experience, even when you’re the one that initiates it. I also learned that people use different mechanisms to cope with that trauma and sometimes they do so on the subconscious level. One of those mechanisms involves delusion. The man or woman creates an alternate reality for himself or herself, making false connections between unrelated events and drawing conclusions that are wildly inaccurate. What is sad, though, is they don’t realize what they’re doing. This is what happened to me. I had woven together a whole fantasy of what God was about to do in my life and it effectively numbed my pain. So, when I came out of that delusional state, I not only had to face the pain that I had managed to suppress all those months, but I also had to face the pain of reality – that a promise that I had become so emotionally attached to was not for me after all. Talk about a double-whammy. What I know now, though, is that God intended to use that experience to reveal my true condition to me: my brokenness. If I hadn’t gone through that, this very broken woman would have very much believed that she was whole. And it’s really hard, even for God, to fix someone that has no clue that they are in need of fixing.

Solomon once said, “To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven” and then further down in that same chapter he said that there’s “a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up” (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 3). After more than a year of walking around in that state of delusion, I am now in my season of healing. I’ve had enough of brokenness and all of the poor decisions it has caused me to make.

What about you? Are you whole or broken? Is God using a difficult experience to show you you so that He can begin the work that He’s been wanting to do all along? If so, I encourage you to surrender to the process. It is not short in its supply of pain, which will be unearthed as you work through all of your unresolved issues, but the healing and restoration that will be revealed in the end will be well worth all that you’ll have to endure in order to reach it.

11 thoughts on “Restoration is Preceded by Brokenness

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  1. Howdy!

    Aaaaah the joys of the sanctification process and our participation.

    Complete and under renovation, both reluctant and eager to experience the restoration he has to offer. If only we remember how he worked in our past experiences during our current challenging times…but where would the fun be in that.

    Peace to you

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    1. You are always speaking the truth!! How easily we forget how God’s grace kept us and carried us through in previous challenges – all we can think about is here and now! But thank God that when we surrender to the process, it always produces the desired outcome.

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      1. You are 100% right and having that community has made all of this much easier to wade through. Thank God for the brothers and sisters in Christ that He’s placed in our lives to walk alongside us ❤️

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      2. Im sorry to hear that you have been through a rough time, but so glad you have a eternal perspective, a willingness to be real and have people who can walk with you Tausha.

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  2. “And it’s really hard, even for God, to fix someone that has no clue that they are in need of fixing.” This here is absolutely true!

    I heard a sermon a few weeks ago by Tony Evans that pointed out how necessary it is for us to be broken. He highlighted some of the points you shared, but also addressed that being broken is what is needed to reveal the treasure within.

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    1. The treasure within…I love that so much. Many of us are too humble to believe that we even possess treasure within to begin with. I personally struggle with this so if you have any thoughts on how to see yourself that way while staying humble, I would love to hear! And thank you SO MUCH for reading!

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      1. It was my pleasure reading and catching up with you.

        Sister, I’ve struggled with this too. I remember avoiding spending excess time in front of the mirror because I didn’t want to appear vain – until a friend pointed out that I was not honoring God by not spending enough time to care for the body.

        The key I think having said the above, is to find a balance. Seeing myself how He sees me and accepting my worth while NOT flaunting it to others. So, He creates you to be a good writer – do the job without demanding others acknowledge this. Embrace the gift and the giver without seeking for satisfaction or accolades from those around. That has helped me to be confident and comfortable in my skin despite the views of the world. I’ve also found that listening to the advice of good/godly friends help to gauge my thinking too. Lastly but not least, spending time in the Word helps me to walk in humility when I realize apart from Him – I’m just dumb and dung. He’s the One that causes me to shine cause He’s shining in me. Holy Spirit will nudge me too and say “you’re thinking too much of yourself honey” lol.

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      2. “So, He creates you to be a good writer – do the job without demanding others acknowledge this.”

        THAT PART! When I first started blogging, I struggled with this! I expected people to read my posts and comment on them and tell me how much they enjoyed them but instead I was virtually ignored. I was sooo hurt and disappointed. But that’s what I get because I was doing it for the wrong reason. Now, I write because I want to be obedient to my calling and because I hope that someone will be blessed by my words, even if it’s just one person. And if no one likes or comments on it, that’s okay because after God gets through ministering to me while I’m writing, it was well worth the effort.

        And I wholeheartedly agree – no matter how wonderful we think we are, the truth is that without God in our lives, we are devoid of everything that makes us so “wonderful”. It is His light, not our own, that shines and draws others to us. Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and for being transparent and letting me know that I’m not the only one struggling to find that balance. It truly is a process, isn’t it?

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      3. My pleasure, sister.

        Yes! It is indeed a process for sure.

        “And if no one likes or comments on it, that’s okay because after God gets through ministering to me while I’m writing, it was well worth the effort.” – a resounding amen to that

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